Exploring Roy

So when I got here to Hawaii I decided it was time for a fresh start. A new me. So when people would ask I started saying that my name was Roy. I used to think that name was so sissy. The only thing I knew was I was spared the french version (LeRoy) by my mother's intervention, and that there is a town in Utah called Roy.

But lately I've been thinking of how cool that name is. Maybe I would have been popular if I had gone by that name in High School. Roy is the guy with feathery hair who plays accoustic guitar for the girls in the high school cafeteria. That being said I'll quickly mention my favorite Roys.

Roy Stalin
Roy Stalin is of course the high school hunk in Better Off Dead who stole Lane Myer's girlfriend Beth. She told Lane over the phone that she would be better off dating someone more popular. Feathery hair, plays accoustic in the high school cafeteria. Sound familiar? Roy is a Dreamboat. If he were from California he would be a California dreamboat. Roy is the reason high school girls put up with jerks for boyfriends.

Roy Orbison

My mother loves Roy Orbison more than all get out. I don't really know that much about him. I know. He's a member of the legendary Traveling Willburys. Which seems to be the most famous band I know of where no one can tell me any of their songs. All that is beside the point. I dig that he is a prolific musician but what really gets me is the growl. I'm talking about the part in the song Pretty Woman where he rolls his throat. That's sexy. I've been working on it. Also, the glasses are great. Guys can't don (Roy doesn't wear anything, he dons) eyewear like that anymore. I don't even dare try.

Deep Roy

Deep is my current favorite Little Person. OK So we all know that he was in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory but did you know that he was also the "pig-brained Peking Homonculus" or "Mr. Sin", a villain with a distinct appetite for homicide, in the acclaimed Doctor Who story The Talons of Weng-Chiang? It's true. Also, he was freaking in Flash Gordon - one of the funniest movies ever - as Princess Aura's Pet, Fellini. Now don't confuse him for that silly actor in The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. That ain't Deep.

Robert Roy MacGregor

Otherwise known as Rob Roy. My family swears that we are related to William Wallace as I'm sure everyone with Scottish ancestry does. Now we do have Scottish blood and my Uncle Jim tells me that we had ancesters who bled at Dunkirk, so this is as close as I can get. I don't know much about Rob Roy other than what Liam Neeson has taught me. But I'll tell you that the final sword fight in Rob Roy is the best. Of course he gets beat but you can't defeat a guy who simply grabs your blade with his hand and pulls you in to kill you.

Anyway, that's all I got. Those fantastic famous Roys and of course Roy Utah. Now you tell me that I should go with Jeremiah over Roy? Yeah, right.